Calibration in Human Behavior is one of those not-so-secret, though often-overlooked skills. Simply, calibration is noticing the differences in people, between moments–observable shifts in their objectively noticeable, outward behaviors. That includes changes in skin tone or coloration, posture, movement, though it can also be more subtle. I’ve shared a story before about noticing pupil dilation […]
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The end of an intimate relationship, as with the end of a friendship, is no cause for celebration. Though a truly toxic relationship must end. If you’ve exhausted all options for correcting the behaviors and healing the wounds, ending the relationship may be the only sensible thing. Then hopefully each of us can go on, […]
One of the things that came up in my first Sublinfluence™ workshop, a few years back, was surprise that it’s even necessary in most cases. For those who’ve never attended one, I teach a two-step process for persuasion. The first aspect, often overlooked in most situations where people attempt Influence, is what I call “Radical […]
Curiosity does more than lead to massive innovations in our quest for prosperity, even survival. It tunes our senses to gather the information we need. In the question of Influence, for example, we presuppose that the other party doesn’t yet agree with us. And maybe that’s true. So how do we respond? Some people become […]
Rules of thumb form in every culture, and for the most part, survive because overall, they work. Though for an example of one that should probably die off, search “rule of thumb origin.” It’s widely said that “Curiosity Killed the Cat,” and yet I’ve had a number of cats in my time, and while each […]
This past two months, I’ve spoken about a coworker who greatly exaggerated his own abilities. Quick recap: He promised all kinds of great rewards and, even early on, before anyone knew of his capability (or lack thereof), we could all smell the distinct odor of, as mentioned, bullshit. He agreed to something, a bit of […]
Last month, I spoke about a coworker who greatly exaggerated his own abilities. He promised all kinds of great rewards and, even early on, before anyone knew of his capability (or lack thereof), we could all smell the distinct odor of, as mentioned, bullshit. He agreed to something, a bit of a test, that would, […]
When mastering unconscious influence, that is, conscious influence over others’ unconscious minds, it should be apparent that the opportunity for unethical use is always present. This is a big reason some people object to my teaching and writing about it. As if, but for me, no one would ever figure this stuff out! As much […]
I’ve always been fascinated by Influence, how leaders or influencers get us to take an action they prefer. Which means I’ve sat through more “get-rich-quick” pitches than you likely would. It was interesting, and I’ve learned a lot. Naturally, many of these pitches simply lie to make us believe something will work for us. Some, […]
In a hypnosis workshop on South Padre Island in 2007, I taught the concept of nominalizations. This is a part of NLP’s Milton Model, one of the key models in Neuro-linguistic Programming. A nominalization, simply, is a noun that used to be a verb. Think about that for a moment. A word like “security” comes […]